Choosing a Mattress for Two: What Couples Should Consider (and Compromise On)

Contrary to popular belief, mattress shopping with your partner doesn’t have to test your relationship. If you know what you’re looking for and where to compromise, it’s possible to leave with a mattress that makes you both want to spend a little more time under the covers. 

Size Matters

If there’s one decision we can all agree on, it’s that bigger is better. Get the largest size bed your room can handle. Between different sleep positions, different schedules, or the occasional elbow or knee where it doesn’t belong, having a bigger bed tends to solve a lot of problems before they start.

Stop Overthinking Firm vs. Soft

A lot of couples walk in already stuck on firmness labels, usually on opposite ends of the spectrum. One wants firm, the other wants soft, and suddenly it feels like it’s time for couples therapy. 

Here’s the part most people don’t realize: there is no real industry standard for firm, medium, or soft. One brand’s “firm” can feel like another brand’s “medium.” 

It’s also important to remember firmness and support are not the same thing. A mattress can feel soft and still give you excellent support, and a firmer feel does not automatically mean it’s better for your body. Once you stop chasing labels and focus on how you actually feel, it’s a lot easier to find something you can both happily commit to (especially since we can customize any mattress to fit both of your exact needs).

When to Meet in the Middle

Believe it or not, you don’t have to see eye to eye to feel comfortable in the same bed. (As far as your mattress goes, anyway.) Something as simple as a pillow top over a firmer mattress can help bridge the gap.

If that still isn’t cutting it, there are a few more ways to get on the same page. A king can be built with two different feels on each side, so everyone gets what they want without bringing it up every night. Or you can go with a split king, which separates the mattress entirely and fully eliminates motion transfer if schedules or sleep styles are completely different.

At the end of the day, everyone sleeps better if no one feels like they’ve settled. 

Adjustable Accordingly

Adjustable bases are also a great option for when both partners can’t agree on the same position. 

A split king lets each side move independently, so one person can sit up, elevate, or get comfortable without turning it into a group activity. Late-night scrolling, early mornings, or just getting into your ideal position… everything stays on your side.

If you’d rather stay together on one mattress, a single base still does the job. Either way, it’s about letting the bed adapt to both of you instead of one person always having to give in. 

There’s Always a Way to Make It Work (Seriously)

Ultimately, every couple has their differences. Your mattress just doesn’t have to be one of them. When you find the right fit, you can finally Stop Sleeping Around…Sleep on a Shovlin.®